Intelligence Is Part Of State Craft, Your Majesty - By: Lucille Uttermohlen

My friends, family and even my dog know I don't have much love for gov'ment. It is my experience that people take themselves too seriously when they get a bit of authority. They forget that they are human, just like the rest of us, and behave, well, like idiots. This particular judge is a case in point.

My client had been charged with a DUI, which is legalese for driving with an unlawful blood alcohol ratio. It is a serious crime, and the fact that my client got picked up for possession of wacky tobacco the next week did not help her application for the citizen of the year award.

She went to court on these two charges and was given a suspended sentence on the "DUI" and a conditional discharge for the green leafy substance rap. Her suspension for the DUI was revoked, and she served the time for it. She was released, and went home thinking the whole nightmare was behind her.

About a week after her release, the sheriff called her and asked her to turn herself in to finish serving her sentence. It appeared that she hadn't served the additional time called for under the conditional discharge. This kind of disposition means that if you don't get in any more trouble during your probation period, the prosecutor will dismiss the charge. If you do get caught doing something naughty, all bets are off, and your original sentence automatically comes into effect. My client hoped to decline the sheriff's continued hospitality.

I filed what is called a "motion to modify sentence for her." Among the facts I cited for relief is that the reason she had been revoked originally was that she tested 001 in her pre-jail alcohol screening, when she reported for 1 of the 5 weekends she was supposed to serve as a term of her probation under her original sentence. That isn't a lot. In fact, you need a .08 to be considered too drunk to drive here.

The prosecutor wasn't willing to change the sentence. He was afraid being reasonable about it would "set a precedent." This is gov-speak for "we wouldn't want someone else to have the right to fight a shockingly unjust sentence in the future because we might have to justify our own stupidity." Okay, that's just one person's interpretation, and that one person gets mad every time she thinks about the situation. But, what the heck! She's right!

Of course, the judge wasn't any more reasonable. Even though she had already served 2 months for the breathelizer's very low alcohol reading, the judge wouldn't be able to sleep at night unless she did the additional time for her "conditional" discharge.

So, you have a situation where she was at less than 1/10 of 1% which is 7.9 points less than the amount needed to be driving illegally, and she ended up in jail for 5 months for something she didn't do which was drink. She feels it is possible that the soy sauce she used or some candy she ate may have caused the reading. Frankly, I think the breathalyzer was on the blink.

I made the mistake of pointing these facts out to the judge, which only honked him off. I tried to convince him that it was nothing personal. Its just that the full force of the law seemed a little much in this instance. I hoped Indiana didn't want to jail her denizens for such a petty violation of her oh so just laws.

The judge yelled that he WAS the state, and if I thought differently, I was very near committing contempt. I tried again to explain that it wasn't personal. I was just asking for mercy. After all, sending the lady back to jail wasn't justified, and the judge did have jurisdiction and authority to modify her sentence.

"I AM the STATE, Miss Uttermohlen!" he roared again.

The poor woman ended up in jail. I am left to wonder:

Does society gain anything when one of us is punished like that? Shouldn't there be room to reconsider results when they are so far out of line with what is being punished? After all, even one beer would have netted a higher reading unless the breathalyzer was way out of whack. Even if a defendant, say, took a swig of cough medicine or mouthwash, before going to jail, the reading would have been higher. It is more likely that the machine was more to blame for the reading than anything my client might have consumed.

Shouldn't a judge be allowed to, nay, expected to do justice, or should we just content ourselves with good little people who follow rules, no matter how stupid? If he is, as he claims, "The State of Indiana," I'm moving to Illinois. At least their corrupt officials are open about it.

Copyright (c) 2010 Lucille Uttermohlen

About the Author

When she's not tending her imaginary rain forest in Judgipoo's courtroom, Lucille writes about adult relationship issues at http://www.couple-or-not.com Her blog is http://www.couple-or-not/blog and you can always email legal questions or just vent at lucille@couple-or-not.com

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