Don't Let Your Blues Defeat You: 3 Tips To Win The Fight - By: Lucille Uttermohlen

Anyone who has ever felt alone or hopeless knows that feelings of sadness and depression are real, and not imaginary. When you feel lonely, your pain can be magnified because of the things that go on in your mind.

We used to have a next door neighbor who lived in her big house by herself. She didn't drive, and she never went anywhere. I don't know how she got her groceries or did anything she had to do with the outside world. I saw her in her back yard occasionally, but other than those rare sightings, she spent most of her life in her living room.

She wasn't a bad person. When my siblings or I had something to sell for school, she would make her contribution. She showed me plants in her yard because they were very interesting. But, the life she lived in her head was much more exciting and dangerous than anyone in our small town could conjure from reality.

"I wish those boys across the street would quit harassing me," she would complain to my mother.

"those Robertsons fight with each other every night. I've often been tempted to call the police," she might confide at another time.

The boys she thought were cat calling to her had grown up and moved away years ago. The other neighbors lived closer to us than they did to her, and we never heard a peep out of them. To our neighbor, however, the things she complained about were as real as the blue sky above was to the rest of us.

Happily enough, our imaginations don't usually go on overdrive when we're sad. But, long term depression can make our environments seem a good bit less friendly than they are. It is important to learn how to cope with occasional cases of the blues effectively before they damage long term mental health. These suggestions might help:

1. Don't stay alone. Join church groups, clubs or civic groups so that you are in contact with other humans. It may be awhile before strong enough bonds are created to become satisfying friendships, but getting out of the house will lend you perspective on the world, and give you a chance to see your life in a new, and hopefully brighter light. If you give yourself and the other people you meet a chance, you will find that relationships develop, and that eventually you will have friends to keep your thoughts warm and happy.

2. Adopt a dog or cat. Your pet won't share your taste in music and poetry, but you couldn't ask for a more loving companion. Animals are not two faced about their affections. They appreciate food and attention, and will recipricate your love with a warm enthusiasm that is bound to chase your blues away. Besides, a dog or cat isn't going to fight you for the last piece of pizza if you keep it out of their reach, or argue about what to watch on TV.

3. Expand your knowledge. Read a book or take a class on a subject you've always wanted to explore. Surf the net, and read information that you've always wanted to have. Maybe there is a class in your area that you would enjoy. If you fill your brain with new thoughts, it won't have room to aggravate you about the things that make you unhappy.,

If you are depressed for a long time, you should consult a health professional. Even if you can identify the reasons for your sadness, a person trained in mental health can help you cope with the feelings that are interfering with your peace of mind. Depression is nothing to be ashamed of, any more than diabetes or cancer are reasons for embarrassment. What is important is that you get the boost you need so that your life can be a pleasure rather than the burden it can feel like at times.

Copyright (c) 2010 Lucille Uttermohlen

About the Author

For good clear information about divorce issues, visit Lucille Uttermohlen at http://www.couple-or-not.com Send your legal and relationship questions to lucille@utter-law.com for a quick, thorough response.

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