Christian Dating - By: Eddie

The dating scene can be very different depending on where you go, what time you go there, and how many alcoholic beverages you drink before you leave. But all sarcasm aside, there are very different reasons why people date. When you think of Christian dating, generally your thoughts do not go to night clubs or all-night bars. Christian dating typically refers to dating as the first steps to developing a rewarding long-term relationship with the ultimate goal or at least strong possibility of marriage. One night stands and frivolities generally do not make the cut. In this article you will read more about what Christian dating is all about, how you can use the internet for your Christian dating needs, and general Christian dating tips.

Basic principles of Christian dating

Ethics are obviously important to someone who is entering the Christian dating scene. While everyone's ethical code are not exactly identical, there are a few basic principles that will generally hold true for all people of the Christian faith. Interpretations of Biblical and other doctrinal guidance when it comes to dating are not always perfectly straightforward and many people interpret the same passage of scripture or respective doctrine differently. Thus the following list of guidelines for Christian dating is by no means meant to be interpreted as the only list of counsel that it would be wise to abide by. However, if you stick to these basic principles, chances are that it will be a lot less likely that you will get in trouble by failing to adhere to any guidance for prudence at all.

Start out slow

It is generally a good idea to not date too frequently when you are first starting out. Dating too frequently puts a lot of pressure on the couple to become members of a serious relationship rather than focusing on first on developing a friendship, a foundation that any Christian relationship needs. You need to allow yourself time to learn more about the other person and for introspection. The other person will also benefit from some time away from you. This time away allows for both parties to be more excited and happy to see one another at the next meeting.

Group date

There are a lot of moral dangers that can be avoided if you do not allow yourself to be left alone with just your date and your hormones. It is advised to go on a date with another couple. In this arrangement, you are much more likely to keep your actions in check and to stay farther away from the limits that you have set for yourself. Remember that staying in a group also provides you with a security net not only for yourself, but also against any actions that your partner might take that you are uncomfortable with.

Stick to your values

There can be a lot of pressure to act a certain way when you are on a date because you want the person that you are with to like you. This is nothing to be ashamed of, but it is something that you need to be aware of. Keeping your actions in check and sticking to your values is hardest when it is most important. You should not feel pressure by what other people around you do, or by how you think that they feel about what you are doing. It is important to remember the basic principles you have set for yourself for Christian dating and to uphold your values.

Dating within your own faith

This topic is definitely one that is not without debate. While some churches are strict about having their single people only date those of the same faith other churches welcome the dating of other Christian individuals even if the two individuals do not necessarily belong to the same denomination. In other words, the values of the two Christian individuals are more important than the church that they attend. Dating within your own religion gives you an advocate while you are dating because you have someone who is also willing to defend their values in the case that an uncomfortable situation arises. You do not have to worry about justifying your actions or compromising your values to make another individual feel more comfortable.

Christian dating is about finding the right person for you. In the process of looking for Mr. or Ms. Right, you want to remain as safe (as in distant from sin or any act that you may regret having done later) as you can. Meeting the right person starts with spending time with the right kinds of people. When you do this and at the same time remain true to yourself, the relationships that you will make will be fare from artificial, in fact, you can create relationships or that one special relationship that can last a lifetime.

Online Christian dating; what is included in a good Christian dating website?
Using the internet to find other Christian singles is becoming more and more popular for many reasons that range from convenience to comfort. But "Christian Singles" and "Christian Dating" websites are not created equal. In fact, some sites that carry the name "Christian" are not necessarily even religiously based; they simply use the term to attract a certain kind of person, not necessarily because they want to promote that like-valued people get to know each other. Below you will find the top five things that should be included on a Christian dating website:

Privacy/Safety - Your first and main concern with joining any kind of dating site is going to be one of privacy of your personal information. Some sites require that you fill out a lengthy and maybe even personally revealing profile that you probably do not want to make accessible to just anyone. Be careful with the kind of information you do choose to divulge and remember that there are criminals out there who love to take advantage of people who may let their guard down and reveal information on an emotional whim that really should remain personal.

Look for Christian content - Any one can use the term "Christian" in their advertising for a specific social site, so what you really want to look for when trying to find people who are genuinely interested in a Christian relationship is to base your profile searches on the number of quality Christian profiles found, posted prayers, statement of faith, Christian links, Christ-like, cheerful and prompt customer service help.

Website speed - Although this feature is not necessarily directly related with your desire to find a good Christian partner, not having to deal with the frustrations of pages that take a long time to load or searches that last all day can certainly make the process of online dating a lot more pleasant.

Good search selection - The more people that you are able to access in your search, the better your chances will be of finding a compatible mate once those search option criteria are narrowed down. A good Christian dating website should have a database with a large demographic area included.

Wide range of search options - Search options determine how detailed a search can be conducted. The more detailed you are able to get with your search, the better you can eliminate people who may not be exactly the kind of mate that you are looking for.

Dating to develop a relationship

Talk to each other - The best way to get to know someone is by talking to them. Talk about a wide variety of topics. Make sure that you are not the only one doing the talking, being a good listener is also imperative. The more you talk, the more you will begin to know if the relationship that you are beginning is one that may be worth continuing to pursue.

Look for a friend - Surely you have heard that the person that you marry should also be your best friend. So naturally, the best way to find that special someone is to look for a best friend.

Avoiding physical intimacy - There is nothing wrong with physical intimacy within the right parameters. For most Christians those parameters are pretty thin until you are married. Avoiding temptation is one of the most difficult things that Christian people have to learn how to control. One suggestion for ensuring that you do not let your relationship go too far too fast is to choose not to kiss while you are dating at least until you have chosen to be engaged. Although this sounds very strict, hopefully the logic behind it can be seen. Where there is very little allowance it is easier to stop something before it becomes too serious.

Always treat your date with respect - Remember not only the Christian values that you were raised with while on a date, but also keep in mind the value of treating another human being with the same respect and courtesy that you would like to be treated with. When you observe the "golden rule" while dating both you and your date will have a happier and more uplifting experience together.

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About the Author

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