Child Custody: If The Parents Don't Make The Decision, The Child Could Suffer - By: Lucille Uttermohlen

My clients have hired guardian ad litems who have done a good job of investigating their custody claims. However, they have also been ripped off by people who take sides, and judges who don't think for themselves. The result can be that a child ends up in a situation that is not necessarily in her best interest, and that can be down right damaging.

As I said, not all "GALs" are bad. I had one recently who did a good job. His report was not in my client's favor, but I could see that he had done a lot of work before he came to his conclusion.

In addition to visiting each of the parent's homes several times, he investigated their medical records, job histories and references. He pointed out the weaknesses on both sides in an objective and fair way. After reading the report, I could advise my client to accept his recommendation with a clear conscience.

My next "GAL" report wasn't so reliable. The lady believed what she was told, and what the parents let her see, rather than dig deeper. The man had sense enough to have children's books and toys scattered around his living room when the GAL came to see him. He lied about the mother and her care of the kids. He swore the kids were never allowed to watch TV, and that he played with them and educated them every moment he was not at work.

My client was a careful housekeeper. The kids' toys and books were picked up when the GAL came to her house. She admitted that the kids watched TV occasionally, and that she had had a loud fight with her boyfriend when the kids were not there.

My client had had custody of the kids for a year and a half between the provisional hearing and the final decree. The father had been unwilling to change his visitation times so that his daughter could attend kindergarten. AS a result, she had to miss 2 days each week so that her mother wouldn't be held in contempt of court. The father didn't pay a dime of support, despite the fact that he had been ordered to, and that he had a good job throughout the case.

Even the questions the "GAL" had the parties fill out before she started her investigation showed that the father was being less than honest. Still, the GAL recommended that the father be given custody. I wrote to the lady several times, trying to get her to correct her mistakes. I provided documentation and referred her to the written answers to her own questions. After 3 letters from me, she wrote back, informing me that she never revisited a case, and I could take my complaints to the judge.

We had a final hearing. I did point out the inaccuracies in the GAL's report. During the hearing, I got the distinct impression that the judge understood my observations. Nevertheless, he ruled in the father's favor.

From this experience, I hope to emphasize how risky it is to let a third party decide your custody issue. Your judge may be careful, and generally make the right decisions. Some cases could go either way, in that both parents would provide a good home to the child, and are equally close to him. There are enough cases, however, that can turn on misinformation, making it more likely the wrong decision will be made that an extra dose of caution is warranted.

If you and your spouse can't agree on custody, you are risking one of you being unhappy with the court's final decision. A guardian ad litem may do a good job of investigating your situation. However, it is possible that poor training or personal prejudices, or plain human stupidity may make a fair report impossible. The judge, too may not be able to reach a good decision because of inadequate information or the other reasons just mentioned. This is why it is always better if the parents can work together to come up with a parenting plan that is appropriate for their children and their family's circumstances.

Copyright (c) 2010 Lucille Uttermohlen

About the Author

For good clear information about divorce issues, visit Lucille Uttermohlen at http://www.couple-or-not.com Send your legal and relationship questions to lucille@utter-law.com for a quick, thorough response.

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