Breaking Up Is So Hard To Do - By: Tony Edwards

Does your to do list for today look something like this?
- Take out the trash
- Mow the lawn
- Break up with my mate

I bet not...

While breaking up is not the top thing to do on anyone's list, break ups do happen and someone has to make the move first. Ending a relationship is not easy, but most bad relationships last way beyond their expiration date. It is so hard to break up, neither party wants to be the "bad guy" and initiate the end of the relationship.

Sometimes break ups happen in a flaming fury with explicit words being exchanged and furniture thrown out the door.

On the other hand, some relationships just fizzle out until someone admits "I quit."

But is there a way to end a relationship without anyone getting hurt?

If you feel as though you must end the relationship, then decide the real reason that you want it to end. Sometimes the reason on the surface is not the real underlying reason for the disinterest in the relationship. So be "honest" when you discuss the REAL reason that you cannot continue in the relationship. It is only fair to you and your partner.

Make sure to plan the break up at a convenient time for both you and your partner so as to allow time for discussion. It is best to break up in person unless it is a long distance relationship, then it may have to be done on the phone. No matter the situation, do it sooner rather than latter.

If you plan to end the relationship as friends, make sure you are caring and compassionate when the break up occurs. You need to end the romantic ties, but try to keep the friendship connection intact.

Do not end it by starting the blame game and putting your partner in a defensive mode. Talk about the good times that the two of you had and how much you learned from each other. Make sure you pay attention to your partner as he/she may get extremely emotional and you will need to respond with compassion to their needs.

Do not take anything that is said during the break up personally as emotions make people do and say things they really do not mean. Listen intently but do not take the words to heart.

It may take more than one meeting to conclude the relationship. Sometimes people want more space and to be left alone while others want to talk more to talk it out. Either way, give your ex time to adjust to the loss of their mate and the relationship.

If you are serious about the break up, do not let your ex shame you or make you feel like you are the "bad guy." If it is time to end of the relationship, then someone has to do it and that someone happens to be you. It is time to make a move and get on with your life. Even though your ex does not know it, it is best for the both of you to end it and not let it drag on.

Will the two of you ever get back together? Is the end really the end forever?

The answer to these questions is yet to be seen. Even so, end the relationship on good terms. You never know, you may want to go back together later if you can work things out. Every relationship deserves a second chance along the way. Sometimes, spending time apart can make you realize what you really had.

If the time has come to end the relationship for sure, it is better to make a clean break and get it over with. However, if you are in doubt about ending the relationship, there are ways to get a broken relationship back on track.

About the Author

Want to know more or do you have an issue not fully covered? Learn how go get your ex back and get a free making-up guide at http://makeup.kteweb.com

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